We Need Therapists to Be Class-Conscious, Not Facilitators of Internalized Oppression

 Read our latest pieces on core need denial trauma and poverty/survivalism trauma.

Sometimes mental health workers are not actually in alignment and do not actually show empathy to those who are still in survivalism. Though we may see that they are coming at problems from a position of privilege and may forgive them for class blindness (ironically an empathy problem), that doesn’t mean that it doesn’t still cause us pain.

Here’s what mental health repulsion due to still be in a place of survivalism or working with people who are still in survivalism looks like:

“That’s deep.” (trivialization, invalidation, show of disrespect)

“Mental health work is a scam.”

“I can’t stand mental health work.”

“Mental health doesn’t matter. There are more important things.”

“Mental health doesn’t allow us to punish people who need punishment.”

“Mental health work is a cancer that makes people weak.”

“I hate mental health workers. They’re all shallow bimbos.”

Even in the depths of human unansweredness, fellow abandonment, grief, horror, and resignation all humans deserve dignity, respect, safety, self-worth, the right to access hope even if they don’t want to cash in on that access just yet, and understanding.

Mental health work informs materialist success by

• Combatting financial trauma beliefs that keep us broke
• Combatting self-worth issues that keep is in cycles of addiction and scarcity
• Soothing our nervous system
• Building credit with our subconscious mind; it remembers everything we say to it
• Building credit with ourselves; the safer our internal language is, the less likely we are to project unsafety or villainy unduly onto others, especially “safe yes” people
• Lifting us out of time scarcity into time abundance, allowing our efforts to have longer impact instead of being quick fixes that immediately collapse
• Building credit with our communities; people don’t feel we are unsafe. If you invalidate mental health work, I promise there is a whole body of people that are holding their tongue about feeling unsafe around you.
• Keeping our cups full while combatting materialist problems

The concerns against mental health work in the case of those who align with survivalism

• They cloak the accuracy of extremely negative signaling stemming from poverty zones in a wash of words that have no application to the precarity the victims feel
• There is no alignment to the deep pains inherent in poverty and exploitation, yet these individuals claim to be masters of empathy. Mental health work feels like it skipped a few steps and wasn’t intelligent enough to notice. Honestly true very often in these cases. There is a lot of classism inherent in mental health work.
• We can’t help if we cloak the real issues in a cloak of positive words meant to make us attractive. Yet, if we are still sitting in the black hole of our lack, grief, exploitation, trauma, and unansweredness no amount of positivity will put us in alignment with abundance.
• They force people at the end of their battery to say words that are a complete lie to them. For instance, asking a homeless person who may experience assault, rape, gaslighting, exploitation, bullying, abuse, and homicide threats to just be grateful. Nothing could be more absurd and inaccurate.
• They let people think they have helped someone instead of giving materialistically. People are relieved of their guilt without having sacrificed anything that would actually be of use to the person in need.

Compassionate statements for those who are in alignment with survivalism

• I am not ready for many of these statements, and I am only interested at this time in grief-focused, trauma-focused, and core-need focused affirmations. It is ok for me to reject the rest at this time.
• Even in the depths of human abandonment, I deserve to know I still have the right to whatever moments of joy I catch.
• Even in the depths of human unansweredness, I deserve to know I have inherent lovability, dignity and worth.
• I deserve to not gaslight myself about the fact I am being failed.
• I deserve to say what I need to compensate myself for my society’s failures.
• I am really proud of myself for doing that.
• I deserve all the help I get more than any other group during this time, even though my mind may tell me that I deserve it less than any other group.
• Though I may be really embarrassed and feel like a failure, it is not all my fault. It is ok to let some of the shame flush away into the failures of society.
• I show compassion to myself.
• I hold onto the good moments as my treasure.
• Wherever there is someone without basic support, there are always three or more people that could’ve done much better. I acknowledge this fact, let it take some of my shame, and let it go.
• I deserve humanity and acknowledgment even if other people are not good enough to give it. I don’t need to worry about their feelings on my suffering right now, despite how often they may try to insert those feelings into my suffering. I need to focus on me.
• It is ok if I don’t want to be looked at or known right now. I am in pain. I need to focus on my core needs.
• I take care of myself from the bottom up. I don’t jump ahead of myself and won’t be pressured to.
• I won’t pretend like mental health help is all I need right now. I need the following core needs met first: _____, _____, and ______. It is ok for me to reject the validity of “healing” if these needs are being brushed under the table. I exist for more than to make someone feel or look kind, heroic or benevolent without actually giving much materialistically.
• I won’t allow someone to take from me when I am this low. I feel no shame and a lot of pride keeping that boundary. I take good care of myself.
• I feel camaraderie with people who share my position, however I know to focus on myself during this time and only help in very minimal amounts until I have more to give. I say no to any peer who tries to convince me otherwise and keep my distance.
• I forgive my negativity because it comes from a place of real lack.
• I don’t have to forgive people who could’ve done better. I can chose to forget them. I won’t give them points for helping me when they didn’t actually help, even if they demand them.
• I trust myself more than anyone and even if I don’t, one day I can say this with certainty as I build up bank of self-kindness every day.
• I’m going to get out of this if I want to.
• It’s ok to be tired.
• It’s ok to not want to get out right now because I am tired.
• I have access to hope when I’m ready.
• I can validate when my hope gets brutalized when I try to step out and it fails. I will try again in a different way with safer people when I am ready.
• I can feel positive about the little things while still being deep in the grief of my situation.
• I can be unable to feel positive and that’s very wise too when surviving.
• Whatever I genuinely feel right now is sacred and in alignment with my reality.
• Even in this situation, I deserve to connect with myself and feel happy about that connection.
• Even in this situation, I can use the skills I consent to use to make money.
• Even in this situation, I can use the skills I consent to use to make myself happy just for myself.
• I will not force myself in any way, shape, or form beyond what I can do right now.
• I will continue moving for help and aid to get my core needs met.
• I will use my energy for myself during this time until I am safe, stable, and secure. That is sacred.
• The extreme guilt other people feel in my scenario may cause them to be aggressive to avoid facing the problem. That is their moral failing, not mine. I deserve safety and I will self-defend and advocate for it as necessary.
• I will give what I can of value that doesn’t cost me much. I will not tolerate demands to give more during this time.
• I am here. I deserve safety, kindness, and to be free from harm.
• I am here. It is ok if I hurt terribly. It is ok to grieve.
• I am here. I accept and embrace all safe help.
• I am here. I can look for safe help and I can advocate for myself.
• I am here. I will not be used to make someone else feel superior or endowed. My focus is on me. They are not important in the slightest unless they help in a meaningful and kind way, no matter how much they insist otherwise.
• I don’t have to forgive or care about those who give nothing but words. I can move on to those who give more regarding my core needs without guilt.
• I am my own mother and my own father when I am being failed. I am not someone else’s, no matter how much they may want me to be. I deserve to not be failed and I only have enough for my internal family at this time.
• My core needs are ____, ____, and ____. What organizations can help me get better access to those? Who could I ask if I don’t know?
• I deserve to ask around to get the help I need.
• I don’t take being turned away when in high need personally. That is their moral failing. They were not exceptional people. I deserve to self-advocate. I deserve exceptional people.
• I deserve to be respected even if individuals are not physically or mentally able to hand out the respect I am due.
• I can share these beliefs with a comrade who may struggle with reading them and that can make both of us feel better.
• I will know the right people from the wrong people by whether or not they reject or embrace me for these beliefs. Wrong will reject or discourage my healthiness through invalidation and violence, right will embrace it. I would do well to heed these signals so I can come out of my situation.
• It is safe to be real about my situation.
• It is safe to be real about the cruelty in the hearts of some others and to keep away and disappoint them. This makes me a good person, not a bad person, because it keeps me safe from expectations that will eventually fail. The right people will embrace me for this because they’ve been there. The wrong people will take it personally.
• It is safe to be better than my environment.
• It is safe to be self-loving.
• During my most abandoned and unanswered moments, people of low self-awareness (external world focused others) will project and try to process their most abandoned parts on me. It is my right and duty to say no and leave them to their pain. They need to find a better way to process this. It is ok to feel and know this is gross, entitled, and wrong.
• I do not exist to be the receiver of other’s sloppy and uncompensated transference. I get to say no. If I cause pain during this time, I forgive myself to the limits of my conscience. I will not take accountability claims from people with far more connections and resources who have no understanding and show a real and awful lack of interest in understanding. I will hold them accountable for that instead using my “no” and my words to the best of my ability.
• I will not cloak the pain of my situation to “safe yes” people.

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